How Beautiful Do You Want to Be?

Since we have established that beauty is the primary determinant of a woman's value in the marriage market (not the only, remember, but the primary), you have some decisions to make about this.

If you are naturally gorgeous, you can stop reading this post now. And if you are naturally gorgeous, you know it, people have been telling you this all your life. So go on to the next post. Or maybe a different blog.

For anyone else, from "almost gorgeous" to "quite unattractive", the decisions are the same: how hard are you willing to work at being beautiful?

The things that make a person look her personal best (not necessarily in order) are clothes, makeup, weight and fitness, hair, and mood/self confidence. (Note: weight and mood are critical topics that are covered in other posts). You've seen the makeover movies, and the makeover shows, you know how it goes.  Study these things: makeup (subtle is good, but a matter of personal judgment); what clothes look good on your body; what hairstyles are flattering to you. Spend the money on good haircuts: they are worth it. How to study these topics: books, internet, reality shows, ask your friends and/or relations.

Now, consider: how much upkeep are you willing to commit to, long-term? Because if you make yourself over for the dating scene and drop it after you're a couple, your man will become dissatisfied. Maybe not right away, but eventually. If you hate clothes and shopping and don't want to change that, then don't buy a sophisticated wardrobe. If you like hanging around in your boyfriend's t-shirt, or really ratty old clothes of your own, consider this: that look can be attractive, but in reality it is really only good on thin and beautiful people.

And as for fashion: forget about it. The number of straight men who are interested in fashion in any way is vanishingly small. Just don't be too dowdy, and wear stuff that flatters you.

About looking sexy: this is a sensitive topic, both to you and to him. You don't want to look like a slut, and you don't want to feel like, or be, a sex object, but there's nothing wrong with feeling attractive. Men differ on this topic: some are sensitive (maybe more than you are) about their girlfriend looking slutty, but they also want their friends to be envious......so, take a middle road until you know.